Saturday, June 23, 2007

Recovering and Austin

Fun at another beach.
Jovee's hot mama, my hot wife.
Jovee is recovering well. She is still not at 100%, the firecracker Jovee we know but she is getting there. We have CT Scans and more tests the first week of July. That will determine what happens next with radiation. We do know for sure that the radiation will be at least 3 weeks, Monday thru Friday. Depending upon what the tests show on the small tissue mass, radiation could be up to 4 weeks. We are leaning towards staying here at Seattle Children’s for the radiation, even though we might have the option of doing radiation at Sacred Heart.

We have yet to learn all the procedures and side effects that will take place with radiation. We’ll cross that bridge when we get there, taking it all one day at a time.
Right know our minds are focused on a full recovery as soon possible from the high dose chemo and the stem cell transplant. We are reminded again and again of the brutal effects of the high dose chemotherapy.

Another concern on our minds is our little friend Austin. He’s just over a year old and has a very aggressive form of leukemia. We’ve become good friends with his family. Our children play well together (Brooke and Megan – Austin’s 4 year old sister – have become good girlfriends, practically inseparable). We have gone through transplants together, were next door neighbors at the hospital, and have gone to church together. It’s easy to fall in love with each others children. In fact we had a pre-arranged marriage set up for Austin and Jovee. What has weighed heavy on our minds is that Austin will return to our loving Heavenly Father much sooner than we had all planned. As of today, Saturday, June 23, 2007, they have given him only a week, most likely less than two to live. Just in the last two days we’ve seen him start to fade. His mother said, “I can see the light in his eyes getting dimmer”. He has been in a lot of pain. In Austin’s bone marrow, there is a rapid growth of cancerous cells. These cancerous leukemia cells overcrowds and basically suffocates the healthy blood cells and then spills out of the bone marrow, into the bone, and then over into the bloodstream. In 1st grade terms, Austin’s mother explained, he’s exploding from inside the bone marrow outwards.
The only way to alleviate the pain, to ease his suffering is to give him high doses of morphine. They are leaving today, Saturday, to go back home because, as mentioned before, the doctors can’t do anything else for Austin.

What to think of all this, I ask myself…what if this was Jovee? Is this preparing us for what could happen to Jovee? I don’t have any spiritual insights or fatherly intuitions about whether Jovee will be taken home or not…the only thoughts that I’ve had through all of this for the past several months is to just appreciate, love, and enjoy every hour with her, with Tyson, Brooke, Bennet, and Jeannine. Who knows…anyone can be called home at any time. A couple of days ago Austin had a big party at the hospital. His parents wanted to celebrate life. Celebrate life…celebrate the moments that you and I have with each other. “Why should we mourn or think our lot is hard, Tis not so, all is right…And should we die before our journey’s through, Happy day, all is well, we then are freed from toil and sorrow too…” I know this is repetitive.

It’s these times, experiences, and moments that brings out the eternal perspectives and what is needed for our eternal welfare. Learning how to accept what is given to us even though we may not fully understand it. Finding a way to believe when your heart is truly broken. That search for peace that will soon mend a shattered heart.


Rodrigo said...

Oi, achei teu blog pelo google tá bem interessante gostei desse post. Quando der dá uma passada pelo meu blog, é sobre camisetas personalizadas, mostra passo a passo como criar uma camiseta personalizada bem maneira. Até mais.

Emily Rutt said...

Hi, I just wanted to say how much I care about each of you! You are truly an inspiration to everyone and we miss you so much! It sounds as if Jovee is doing well considering, and I know that all will be well! If there is anything I can do let me know, I would love to help! I'm coming to seattle in the second week of July and if you are still there i will be sure to stop by to say hello! I love you each so much, love Emily